“Does no contact work to get your ex back” is one of the top ten questions people ask after going through a breakup. The reason it is such a common question is that, if you search the internet for advice on getting your ex back, you see references to the “No Contact Rule” everywhere you look.
Descriptions of success stories are hard to find, but it is still possible to answer the question. Does no contact work?
The short answer is, “Yes.” Certainly, it works better than anything else. It works better than contact of any kind — especially constant, annoying contact, like when you keep texting or calling or emailing or otherwise harassing your ex.
It works better than using a friend to intercede, because that method does not allow you much control over what is being said about you.
It works better than tricks like reverse psychology. And it works better than bribery, whether you are offering an all-expenses-paid vacation, or just make-up sex — because bribery is so humiliating if your offer is refused.
What about the long answer? The long answer is, “Yes, but…,” as in –
Yes, but it is hard, and requires enormous self-discipline.
Yes, but it takes a long time, because you have to wait long enough for both you and your ex to remember the good times at the beginning of your relationship, more easily than you remember the bad times at the end.
And yes, but you have a lot of work to do during the no contact period.
While you are following the no contact rule, you have to determine what went wrong with your relationship, and teach yourself not to make the same mistakes. You have to turn yourself back into the person your ex originally fell in love with. And through it all, you have to learn to control your emotions, and keep yourself sane.
No contact works, and is at the heart of any good plan for getting back your ex. Systems vary on how long they say you should maintain no contact, but the best systems tell you everything you need to do, step by step, during the no contact period.
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